giving up.

i wish my body was covered in one giant scab so i could pick it off, and bleed out.

disappointment.

failure.

spineless.

slob.

terrible.

unmotivated.

doesnt donate to charity.

drives mother's car

shitty writer.

fraud.

dependent.

pretentious.

not making sense.

liar.

underachiever.

pathetic.

miserable.

broke.

hopeless.

not worth it.

deficient.

lazy.

gullible.

stupid.

shit talker.

narcissist.

coward.

self-indulgent.

drug addict.

alone.

are all accurate adjectives, which come together to form the body of the person known as mv swydersky.

radio contest idea

i am going to saran wrap my dick to your face with a christmas tree air freshner (or vice versa), and we will stay that way until you either rip my dick off and run away, or until you or my dick asphyxiates, or until we both die of dehydration.

i hope we stay like this forever with both of our skeletons locked together.
i hope they build a museum around our skeletons, and tastefully put a twister board underneath us, matching our body positions.
i want elderly people to whisper to their grandkids outside the exhibit, "now, shut up, pay attention, and don't touch anything, and maybe you could learn something."

this is my only future aspiration, besides scoring some heroin, wearing a lacy bra, and making Stephen Chapasko uncomfortable by flashing him as many times as possible before he joins the navy.