Cybernated Therapy Sessions #3

Insert status symbol (here) if you need to express your social or economic prowess to your "friends" because they need to know how cool and successful you are. Because you're insecure and need validation. It's all about the validation. Afterwards, kill yourself. Rip a page out of your autobiography and slide it across your throat until the skin splits and forms a bloody smile. Because it's the only way for you to realize that the human body isn't composed of designer jeans, diamond earrings, VIP concert tickets, muscle cars, high-end vodka, paychecks, smart phones, careers, and college diplomas.

i didn't go to my college graduation (i got my diploma in the mail)

It doesn't make me happy when people shake my one hand and put piece of paper in the other, especially on stage. What would make me happy is if I could load my roscoe with my college tuition, cock it, pull the trigger, and pop the stacks of bills through the proud eyes of my parents/guardians. Through the sanguine mouths of my class. Through the clapping the hands of the audience, who is properly dressed for the occasion. Through the empty briefcases of job recruiters. And through the elaborately decorated robes of the faculty. 


Doing this, swallowing k-pins and smoking a Camel.

The body count is high.

It ruins the pageantry of the ceremony.

And no one outside this room gives a fuck.


A handshake and a piece of paper that has letters, printed in a fancy font, and signed by a person who is the president of a college, doesn't mean shit.

“got any hidden talents?”

I can paint the most beautiful/colorful/despondent/gross/innovative picture of any one in my mind, but it never translates very well when I put it down on canvas or a piece of paper.

And if I could show you them to you, I would. Because I think you would all like them. You could post the pictures of yourselves on the outside your refrigerator with magnets. Or on your blog. Or social network. Then you would think that I’m somehow unique, instead of another person with a name tag working a shitty customer’s service job, behind a sterile counter and a door that says : EMPLOYEES ONLY!

SO PROUD.

SO HAPPY.

You people can’t even IMAGINE!

College Graduate: Class 2011!